A Faith Beyond: Understanding the Gospel's Least-Understood Principle (Part 10)

Napoleon Not-So-Dynamite
​
I was 20 years old.

At the time, I was a missionary serving in Brittany, France.

I remember it being a muggy summer, just before Y2K.  I was a new Trainer (for those of you who aren't familiar with the lingo, a Trainer is a senior companion who is paired with a newbie fresh from the homeland).

Several elders and sisters in my district got a little too chummy, so the Mission President exiled them to separate corners of the mission in what we called "Midnight Transfers."

Morale was low.  It probably wouldn't surprise anyone that Brittany was not a high-baptizing area (of course, neither was the France Paris Mission: our whole mission had only 200 baptisms per year).  We used to joke while tracting that every time we knocked on a door, someone was being baptized in South America.

My trainee spoke not a lick of French.  Though I had studied French in high school and in college, I never felt fluent.  They could spot my American accent a mile away.  Nobody mistook me for a native; my voice stuck out like a sore thumb.

And since my companion couldn't communicate in French, I was forced to carry all the conversations.  I was homesick.

I was miserable.

"Blah Blah, Blah Blah, Blah"
​
A newborn baby can't see; babies are born blind (it takes awhile for their vision to develop).

And yet, even without sight, babies can recognize their mother.  How?  Well, by her voice.  Really!  Babies become familiar with their mother's voice in the womb.

Think about that.  So it is with God.  The Lectures on Faith teach that in order to exercise faith in Him, we need "a correct idea of His character, perfections and attributes." (Lecture 3:4).  Like newborn babes, we recognize Him by His voice (John 10:4).

At the end of the day, God's character and perfections and attributes are all found in the words He speaks.  Since He cannot lie, His words are not distinct from Him; they ARE Him!  Thus Jesus is called "the Word" of God (John 1:1).

   And God said:
   Let there be light. 

(Genesis 1:3)

You'd think the correlation of "light" would be seeing, but it's actually hearing.  Case in point: after the resurrection, Mary failed to recognize Christ at the tomb (thinking He was the gardener), even though she stared right at Him.

Yes, that's right: someone as familiar with Jesus as Mary couldn't recognize Him.  It was not until He spoke her name ― "Mary" (John 20:16) ― that, hearing His voice, her eyes were opened.

Perhaps that's true for all of us: Hearing God's voice is what opens our eyes.

Like little children in Christ, we know our Father by hearing Him long before our spiritual vision develops.  Maybe that's what it means to "walk by faith" (or as is more often the case, "crawl by faith").

Another example is found in the First Vision.  What did the Father tell Joseph Smith to do?  See Him?  Watch Him?  Smell Him?  Touch Him?

No:

   This is My Beloved Son.
   Hear Him!

(JS-H 1:17)

We "see" the truth of the whole matter in Paul's words:

   So then faith
   cometh by hearing,
   and hearing
   by the word of God.

(Romans 10:17)

What do you hear?

Ferris Bueller's P-Day Off

​If you've never been to Brittany, France, I hope you get the chance to visit someday.  There is a special spirit connected to the land (partly due, I think, to its Celtic heritage).  You can feel it in the rocks and trees.  If ever a place "spoke" to me, it was in Brittany and Normandy.

If you're wondering what I'm talking about, just look up the standing stones of Carnac.

But I didn't meet God out in nature.  My Sacred Grove didn't involve trees or sunshine.  It happened in a rented kitchen above a little grocery store in Brest, France.

Looking back now, I realize I wasn't a very good missionary; I was too focused on obedience and following the mission rules.  Which sounds ironic, I know.  But it's true: I was the perfect Elder ― and yet, a poor representative of Christ.

I have learned that a culture of strict ("exact") obedience foists us into the role of the Priest and Levite from the Savior's parable of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:29-37) ― the mantle of duty becomes an excuse, a privilege, preventing us from crossing the road to minister to those who need our help, but who live outside our district boundaries, or whose needs extend past our 9:30 p.m. curfew, or whose wounds we dare not risk bringing into our mission apartment.

I share this so you may understand that "worthiness" is not a precondition to hearing God.  It wasn't for me.  Quite the opposite!  Far more likely, we'll encounter the Lord when we're half-naked, bloodied-and-beaten, lying in some street-gutter near Jericho (Luke 10:30).

That's where I was, spiritually-speaking, in the summer of 1999.  Just a lonely, sunburned, self-righteous missionary who felt like a failure.

Rosetta Stones

Scientists say there's a "sweet spot" for learning languages during childhood.  After the age of about 10, our brains develop in such a way that it's nearly impossible for a person to achieve the proficiency of a native speaker.

Now, unlike our physical bodies, our intelligences do not age.  Spirits don't grow flabby skin; they are cellulite-free.  Whether we are five for fifty or ninety-and-nine (Luke 15:7), it is never too late to learn God's language.

Well, it's not so much "learning" a new language as it is remembering what we've forgotten.  All of our spirits are "native" with Christ's; His light (the light of Christ) is part of our spiritual makeup.  We merely have to awaken to what is already within us (3 Nephi 11:5).

As Christ's children who have been born again (Mosiah 27:25), we speak the same language.  The native tongue of Christ's children (and of His angels) is not French or Arabic or Italian (and certainly not German); it is the Pure Love of Christ (Ether 12:34).

Have you heard?  Christ's words carry a distinctive sound (i.e., spirit).  It is a voice that "edifies" (D&C 50:23).

There's a world of difference between edification and flattery.  In my personal experience, the Lord's voice contains a gentle rebuke because it speaks the truth and only the truth ― and let's be honest, the truth is often unflattering.

But what's unusual about it is the fact the Lord doesn't make you feel defensive; He is not critical but hopeful.  "Hey Tim, let me help you with this.  We can do it, together.  I love you."  Through Him we see our shortcomings (weakness) in a matter-of-fact way, while at the same time, His voice triggers the stirrings of faith that, through Him, we can do anything.  Even move mountains.

You can't mistake it; in fact, the resonance of His voice is the sign by which His disciples are known (John 13:35).  Christ's disciples don't rail against sin or sinners; instead they invite us to lift our eyes to Christ who offers healing in His wings.  His words are like music to our hearts: the "voice of mercy all the day long" (D&C 43:25).​

I'll share with you a simple test, which helps me discern whether someone is familiar with God's voice or not.  Listen to how they address LGBTQ issues; how do they approach our LGBTQ sisters and brothers.  Is their tone tender or accusatory?

(A good example of this is Walter Brueggemann's essay on homosexuality.)

Elder Merrill's Excellent Adventure​

A series of unfortunate events culminated one afternoon as I did the dishes after lunch.  I was alone (I have no idea where my companion had gone off to).

I don't think I've shared this before on Owl of the Desert; this may be the first time I have written about it (so I can't knock the fact that Joseph Smith took years to get around to recording his First Vision).

We had eaten tacos for lunch (Americans love tacos).  Leaning over the kitchen sink, who knows, maybe I was having an emotional breakdown; maybe it was just a pity party; but whatever it was, I felt overwhelmed and sad.

In hindsight, I see my heart breaking.  My hard heart breaking, that is.  After all, who wants to give God their healthy-hearts?  No, no: it wasn't until my heart became sorrowful that I felt the need to let the Lord take it; giving Him that old, crusty, rule-oriented thing was a relief.  Let Him throw it away.  I didn't care.

Trying to fight back tears, I stacked the dishes (no dishwasher).  My conscience was clear and yet my spirit grieved.

   [I] had bitterness of soul,
   and wept over [my] brethren,
   and said unto the heavens:
   I will refuse to be comforted.

(Moses 7:44)

I think I might have murmured a bit as I scrubbed the dishes, spouting off at the Lord (like Jonah maybe, or Job).

   I would speak
   to the Almighty,
   and I desire to reason
   with God.

   I have no peace,
   no quietness;
   I have no rest,
   but only turmoil.

(Job 13:3, KJV; Job 3:26, NIV)

Suffice it to say, my spirit was not in the right frame-of-mind.  And yet!  What happened next shows the Lord will meet us anywhere, whether on the road to Jericho or on the road to Damascus or on the road to Emmaus ― whatever road we're on, no matter where we're headed, He'll be there.

"S_V__EIG_TY"

​There are several Christian concepts which don't get much attention in the LDS tradition.  One of them is the doctrine of the Lord's sovereignty.

   Ah Lord God!
   behold, thou hast made
   the heaven and the earth
   by thy great power
   and stretched out arm,
   and there is nothing
   too hard for thee.

(Jeremiah 32:17)

Nothing?  Nothing too hard for God?  "Lord God" is translated from the Hebrew "Adonai Yahweh" (אֲדֹנָ֣י יְהוִה֒).  Other versions of the Bible render it "Sovereign Lord."

What does it mean for Christ to be "sovereign"?  Is there anything beyond His grasp, His authority, His rule?

We were molded as clay upon the Potter's wheel; His hands formed us in His image.  "Is nothing too hard for thee?"  Is there anything greater than His love?

Not long after Jesus's death, at a difficult time in early Church history, when the gospel began to go to the Gentiles, Simon Peter tried to get everyone to chill, putting their minds at ease:

   Known unto God
   are all His works
   from the beginning
   of the world.

(Acts 15:15)

What is the percentage of "all"?  Does that include you and me?  When angelic messengers told Abraham and Sarah they'd have a son, she laughed.  And the Lord asked, quite seriously,

   Is anything
   too hard
   for the Lord?

(Genesis 18:14)

Do we expect He'll have any trouble saving us, when He is the Lord God?  Does He not have enough tomato juice (by which I mean, blood) to bathe us in, to remove the skunk-stink from our flesh (by which I mean, sin)?

We're talking about the Creator of all things; whose Heart is poured out to fill the immensity of empty places, across all of space and spirit!

There's a reason Jesus can confidently counsel His little flock to not worry, to "fear not" whilst we are battered and bruised by earth and hell (D&C 6:34).

   The things
   which are impossible
   with men
   are possible with God.

(Luke 18:27)

The other doctrine that gets too-little airtime in the Church is the "providence" of God.

What does God's providence mean?  It means He will not let us slip through His fingers; He will fight the devil until we are safely in His arms, worlds without end.  I trust Him to keep His promises.

   I lay down my life
   for my sheep.
   I give unto them
   eternal life; 
   and they never perish,
   neither shall any man
   pluck them out of my hand.
   My Father gave them me,
   and is greater than all.

(John 10:15, 28-29)

Having faith in Christ comes naturally when we relax.  God's not going to leave us high-and-dry at the gas station, driving off with the rest of the family, leaving us behind with the scary truckers in plaid shirts and sunglasses; He will never forget us.  We are tattooed upon His palms.

When people say that God gives us faith ("faith is a gift"), that is not quite right.  God does not give us faith; He gives us Himself.  And when we are held against His bosom, our faith becomes unbreakable.  Not because we have an endowment of faith (an abstraction) but because we know Him whose promises and love "never faileth" (Moroni 7:46).   

   And they shall be mine,
   saith the Lord of hosts,
   in that day when 
   I make up my jewels; 
   and I will spare them,
   as a man spareth his own son.

(Malachi 3:17)

A Bodacious Journey​ Begins

​I discovered my spiritual foundation that afternoon as I stood over the kitchen sink arguing with God, weeping into the dishwater.

By "foundation" I mean just that: I found my rock.  I can testify of the Christ who spoke to me that day; and though the whirlwind whip me to shreds, and my body crumble to dust, nevertheless, I tasted and knew of His goodness (Mormon 1:15).

And what did I hear?  Well, the first thing God did was shut me up.

   Who is this
   that darkeneth counsel
   by words without knowledge?

(Job 38:2)

Now, that's not precisely what I heard; but it is exactly what I felt.  I was humbled and stripped bare to the core.  With no disrespect to myself, I felt my nothingness.

But those words are adequate for my purposes.  It's like reading the experience of Joseph Smith in the First Vision, the way he drew upon Bible verses to give voice to something that transcended mortal language:

"They draw near to me with the lips, but their hearts are far from me." 

Joseph lifted those words from Matthew 15:8-9, quoting Jesus who Himself was quoting Isaiah (Isaiah 29:13).  The circle of life.

Now, this next part I am finding difficult to put into words.  Comment-dit-on?  Read the following verses and see if you can guess at it:

Nephi:

   And I pray the Father
   in the name of Christ
   that many of us,
   if not all, may be saved
   in his kingdom
   at that great and last day.

(2 Nephi 33:12)

Mormon:

   And I would that all men
   might be saved.

(Helaman 12:25)

The voice of Jehovah is, quite literally, the voice of salvation.

He wants to save us all.

Heaven's Voice (or, what I like to call the name of the Boy Band formed by the four beasts in Revelation who serve before the throne of God):

   And I heard a loud voice
   saying in heaven:
   Now is come salvation.

(Revelation 12:10)

What I'm trying to say is: the Lord has made provision for all of us; He loves us protectively.

Down to my soul's tippy-toes, I knew in that moment that no matter how depressed I might become, and no matter how many times I fell down, or what anyone might tell me, nothing could rip me away from Him (Romans 8:39).

For I had heard His voice; the voice of Him who anointed us and "who hath sealed us" His (2 Cor. 1:22); and how marvelous it was.

Now, recall I was a missionary.  I thought it was my job to go out and hit the streets, saving the lost sheep of France, you know, by preaching the gospel and baptizing them.  I had carried this weight on my shoulders, thinking it a cross, but in fact it was a millstone.

On no uncertain terms, as with a firebrand seared into my spirit, the Lord made me to know that He (and He alone) was their Shepherd.  He would not fumble their salvation; after all, He was God!  Who was going to stop Him?  He had overcome death and hell.  Forever.

In other words: "Timothy, you don't have to save anybody.  You're not their Redeemer.  I AM.  All you can do, my son, is love them."​

All you can do is love them.

Plain and Precious
a poem

I say unto you,
That God is able
of these stones
to raise up children
unto Abraham.

      ― Luke 3:8
​
​Is the stone
     or seer
 
the instrument
manifesting
     inappreciable things
     to us
plainly?
 
          (If stone,
              why seer?
          If seer,
              why stone?)
 
What makes rock
     precious
           (does God esteem
           atoms in carbon
           hardened into diamond 
      more than those of feldspar
      olivine or quartz)?
 
Seers are peters
    polished
from plain folk
     (common as river rock)
 
seeking the Inappreciable
     in ordinary stoneship:
 
     Seeing in plainness
          preciousness
          not
          presupposed.